addiction.....of a different kind....

i think i'm getting addicted....to writing blogs!......i'm at my office right  now (i'm interning with a newspaper) and i just had this extremely strong urge to write.....dunno whatt i'm going to write about....but i'll figure something out...i always do!.... :-P

i think one of my best qualities is being able to talk my way into or outta any situation(dependin on my benefit.... :-P)....so far ive been lucky to have come outta many uncomfy and/or difficult situations unscathed....i jus hope my luck lasts......fer a very very long time....n wen i say i talk my way outta a situation.....i don mean i put the blame on sum1 else....i jus manage to sidestep the situation and make the problem seem inconsequential.....no harm done.....n i get away....scot free.....well almost....there's always the guilt u no.....but over time.....even that fades.....but having said that....i'd also like to add that im not, by nature, sum1 who takes pride in wriggling my way outta things.....i jus think that sumtimes...its easier to make things go away rather than face up2 them....especially when its minor things like curfew, or not having eaten on time, or wanting to bunk class.....i only use my 'diplomatic' skills to keep my parents pacified n happy...cause sumtimes its better to use a lil' bit of disillusion than to shatter their impressions.....but i'll make it clear once again.....i do not lie or cheat anyone....jus twist the truth....a teensy weensy bit.... :-P


my parents n nik r the most imp people in my life rite now.....and my maternal granparents and aunt and cousins come in a close second......woteva i do.....i do it to make them proud of me.....i'd hate t0 disappoint them in anyway....although i think i have done that plenty of times......i wish i cud take it all back and do better.....fer their sakes.....i'm sayin all this....cause i know of SO many young people out there who believe that their world revolves around them and their friends....n they tend to ignore their homefront.....and sumtimes end up hurtin or distressin their parents irrevocably......its really sad when kids think that they owe nothin to their folks.....n they dont realise till much much later....that family is jus as (if not more) important than friends.....i mean think bout it....ure parents put up wit all ure bullshit n still love u.....how many of ure friends will do that?.....if u have friends who will...lucky u......but trust me....most friends wont......

but that doesnt mean that all parents r loving and caring.....and that u have to sacrifice ure ambitions n hopes n dreams to keep ure folks happy.......it jus means that u need to try harder to understand y u cant along wit ure folks.....n try to make them understand where u come from.....so that they can adjust themselves n accept u fer who u r n wot u wanna b(trust me....it happens).....n even if after uve tried....tried really hard.....n they still don get u.....then go ahead n do wot u want....at sumpoint of time(most)parents will realise their folly......and u will have the satisfaction of havin atleast tried to please and understand them.....

musings.....

Another uninventive title.....but i cant help it.....cause wot im gonna rite are nothin but random musings.....theres no otha word 2 categorise it.....which makes me think.....people classify things n people so easily.....u no wot i mean....'aare....she's such a barbie doll ya'.....'he's a full on playa!'....'she's a total behenji type no?'...all common dialogues among today's youth....v tend 2 blindy put people into 'stereotypes'....its all so superficial.....im not sayin that ive neva done it myself....but of late.....i really have tried to look beyond 1st impressions.....its not that difficult if u really try.....so y am i bringin this up?.....well....cause ive seen how these 'classifications' can make people's lives miserable....


lemme tell u a story....there was this guy in my class in school.....all thro his 'formative years'(fancy language for the teenage and pre-teen phase....) he lived in the shadow of his brother.....his parents compared him to his bro n highlighted his shortcomings......this prolly created an inferiorty complex in him.....n that kinda made him a lil slow....now....none of us kids knew that....n since every class needed a 'sacrificial goat'(anotha fancy term fer 'loser')....well.....we chose him....and made the poor guy's life SO miserable....hell...even the teachers didnt spare him....i mean talk about hittin sum1 when they're down....i tried....i really did....to make him feel lik a part of the class....n he did open up to me quite a bit....but im ashamed to say i gave up due to 'peer presure'.....the poor guy neva got ova it.....he beacame more n more withdrawn.....n that increased the teasing.....i have no idea wot he's doing now.....i really hope he's doing well.....although i seriously doubt it......the bottomline of the story.....this kinda 'classification' can ruin lives......seriously!......


people can b pretty shallow that way.....n that kinda 'elitist attitude' can really b harmful....i mean how many of us look beyond superficialities n really try to understand a person.....its really difficult to be an outcast.....n only people who've 'on the outside, lookin in' can really tell how much it hurts.....the rest of us who've managed to fit in all our lives will neva know how bein the sore thumb can affect us....mebbe that's y we tend to be so insensitive to the feelings of these social misfits.....im not saying that all these misfits have miserable lives.....im jus sayin that we need to take the effort to look beyond the facade.....we need to stop worryin bout wot otha's will think of us if we 'socialise' wit the not-so-'in' crowd.....cause afterall....we're all human beings....we all deserve a chance to make friends.....to be happy....so don judge a person at the first go.....walk a mile in their shoes....n if then u don feel a connection.....feel free to move on......but chances are.....u'll b surprised.....try it sumtime......

hmmm....again... :-P

sorry.....i'm really not good wit 'titles'....or 'headlines' in my to-be-field of work.....i think its a waste of time(prolly a case of sour grapes..... :-P).....actually....not really....sum titles(and headlines) can b extremely hard hittin.....its jus that i cant b bothered wit them....unless i come up wit sumthin almost immediately......i usually jus stick wit nethin random......a bad habit i no.....but i cant help it.....im super lazy....



thinkin bout it now.....ive neva really had 2 work hard at nethin in my life.....except losin weight.....that's one journey im neva likely 2 forget.....i was seriously OBSESSED.....gettin up really early.....sumtimes at 4 in the mornin.....2 go joggin....in bloody cold winter.....almost starvin myself(there were days wen i used 2 eat lik jus one apple....n i used 2 feel guilty bout it!).....n then runnin again fer 40mins in the eve...no matter wot time i come home.....God!....if sum1 asked me 2 do that again...i really don think i cud manage.....its a good thing that i wudnt b able 2......cause ya.....i was anorexic at one point of time....VERY anorexic.....*whew!*....there.....i said it.....its out in the open.....it took a lot 2 admit that in the first place.....n gettin ova it was harder.....but ive neva really told 2 many people bout it....up until now.....i jus hope that my experiences will help sum1 else.....fer every1 who's anorexic (i know its difficult 2 accept....but acceptance is the first step....) i jus wanna tell them that u can get ova it n lead a (fairly) normal life.....its difficult....but not so much that u cant do it.....fer all of u who arent.....i jus hope that u don have 2 go thro that hell(n trust me....it is HELL!).....





durin that phase.....i lost out on a good many friends.....n i lost out on a few good friends.....cause i was so cut-off n isolated from every1....i'd completely stopped meetin people....i dunno wot kinda whacked out logic it was.....but i was scared of meetin people because i thot they'd make me eat....(insane.....i know)....but im glad that atleast one of them is back in my life.....n how!......he's the reason im SO deliriously happy these days....n i have a feelin that its gonna last.....fer a VERY VERY long time.....ive also made a few new good friends.....n now i know that most of the people i knew earlier,i really cudnt count them as friends....acquaintances mebbe......in fact, most people i know even now are jus 'people i know'.....i mite call them friends....but they're jus a part of my 'social network'.....n u no wot i realised.....i am extremely lucky to have good friends....n a decent social network....cause without either one.....life's not complete......most people feel that good friends are all that one needs fer a wholesome existence....but a social network kinda makes u a part of society in a much broader sense.....think about it.....





enuff 'revelations' fer now methinks.....so v'll meet again....wen 'inspiration' strikes.....hope u lik wot uve seen so far....ciao.......

hmmm.....

soo.....this is my first blog eva!....wudve started earlier.....but its just that ive been facin 'technical difficulties'....my pc is super screwed....stupid thing...ever since i got it formatted, it keeps automatically loggin out every 10mins or so....n then u have 2 restart the pc 2 get connectivity....God knows wots wrong wit the machine....i finally decided that i'll use my mom's machine....cause ive ALWAYS wanted 2 blog....i mean atleast fer the last few yrs....




sumtimes i wonder.....y wud sum1 wanna read an unknown stranger's 'life story' or 'musings'?....n then i got my answer....human curiosity....plain and simple....people like to peek into otha ppl's lives n minds.....and also...an insatiable appetite fer the 'written word'.....i LOVE to read....random ravings,people's opinions,fiction,fantasy....everythin except my academic books n boring history or 'non-fiction'.....i mean....the basic purpose of readin, fer me, is to get away from reality.....so i c no point in readin sumthin that's gonna plonk me rite back into reality.....

newe....i have this professor....lets call him 'P'....all my people would know who he is....n boy!...is he 1 crazy man or wot?!.....he can b absolutely delightful at times....n at otha times he jus makes me wanna wring his arrogant lil neck....he's got these weird idiosyncrasies n prejudices....he's absolutely obsessed with 'accuracy' and 'facts'.....he either likes sumthin or actively dislikes it...there's no in between fer him....but thankfully, he doesn't force his opinions onto us or hold our opinions (if we don agree wit him) against us....he's an uber strict disciplinarian...asks us to keep r fones near him durin class....we're supposed 2 keep both hands where he can c them...he's even given us a 'sitting posture' that we're all supp2 follow....i mean talk bout dictatorial!....then he gives us these impossible assignments....once he even asked us to draw an accurate, scaled map of our college campus....including the no. of trees n wot distance they are from each otha....n v had nothin but 5metre scales.....insane!.....i used 2 love attendin his classes....but after a while.....it jus got 2 me.....i don get y he's SO uptight in class.....cause he's a really nice guy outside class....i guess he needs 2 understand that easin up once in a while wont compromise the 'order' of the class in anyway.....in fact....his student mite prolly even respect him more.....but one thing's fer sure....he's one teacher who's gonna b in my memory fer a long time...

i'm a student of journalism btw.....but i don understand how sum1 can 'teach' sum1 how 2 b a journalist....u can teach them the ethics n codes....but u cant teach a journalist how to go about his job or express his opinions....i mean if ure 'training' journalists to write similarly and think alike....doesnt that take away the originality and individuality that the profession's supp2 uphold?!....we're told not to express r opinions or let r views affect us.....but most passionate journalists r all about their views....its their drive n incentive to get in2 this profession....a journalist's job is not only 2 present 'facts'....that's wot i think....but each one to his own.....n then there's this disdain towards feature writing....(people mite say its not there.....but trust me, it is!)....journalists seem 2 think that only reporting 'hard news' and 'risking you're life in the line of duty' is worth appreciation....but writing a hard hitting, touching feature that touches the nerves of the public is equally praiseworthy.....

methinks ive ranted enuff....don wanna make my 1st blog borin now, do we?!.... :-P

(mebbe i already have.....but i shall stop the torture now)......

so until nxt time...ciao.......